THE GRACE OF MARRIAGE

I know as a fact that you have beautiful plans and fantastic ideas of the man or woman you wish to marry, and the family life you hope to live. I also know that some of you are hurting with disappointments from failed relationships, while others are confused and undecided; in a state of fear, unbelief and total shutdown, scared of marriage and everything concerning marriage. And for those already in the marriage vocation, some of you are happy, while for many, it is pains, sorrow and regrets. My brothers and sisters, I appeal that in whatever category you find yourself in this journey of life, be assured of the goodness of God and that you are not alone; that all is not over yet. Be patient and be hopeful in your situation for God sees and knows everything; He is merciful, just and faithful to those who hope in Him. And for those who are happy, I thank God for you and I pray that your joy may not be short lived. May God console those who are hurting with His grace and mercy through Christ our Lord, amen. 

Marriage is a grace and a most important occupation given to man by God for through marriage, man became a propagator of life on earth and souls for heaven. By the grace of the Father, the child became the helper of his father in meeting the designs of the Father for creation Earth. So, the cult of marriage is very important to both heaven and earth; it is the oil that feed and lubricates the wheels of life, the reason for all the beautiful things that God the father created. But unfortunately, it has become so abused and bastardised that it has now become the slaughter house of souls and the high way to hell for many. That instead of building up life on earth and lifting up souls to heavenly glory, it has become the reason for the sorrows on earth, the reason for the multitude of souls in hell, and an embarrassment to the courts of heaven. But mind you that this fault is not attributable to the Perfect God who created marriage, but to the fall of Adam and the decadence in our human nature.

God is good and His plan for man is good. It was out of His goodness and concern for the happiness of Adam; that Adam may not be alone, that God gave him a wife, Eve. Adam was very happy for this kind gesture of God that with a grateful heart, he exclaimed, ‘this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh’. So, marriage, being of God is good, just like all other things of God. The defect in all aspects of the life of man is attributable to man on account of our sin and disobedience at the instigation of the eternally cursed one, Lucifer. In our sinfulness, we shot ourselves on the feet and spat on our faces; we burnt our own bridges. We robbed ourselves of the beautiful gifts of grace and glory, freely bestowed upon us by the most holy and generous being; God Himself through the cult of marriage. For but for the fall of Adam, marriage, like all other beautiful plans of God for man would have been heavenly bliss instead of the torn and torment it has become.  

In the Garden of Eden, the first human couple of Adam and Eve failed to appreciate who God is, what they are to God and who they are to each other, and so thy disobeyed God at the instance of Lucifer. And through their disobedience, the Eternally Cursed one was able to, in our manner of speaking, strike at God through them; he was able to interfere with the eternal plans of God for man and creation. He struck mankind and humanity resulting in the disgrace and expulsion of our first parents from Paradise on Earth and the desecration of their home, family and life. With his lies and false promises, Lucifer was able to attack, overwhelm and conquer them, and he wrecked havoc on earth to the utter dismay and embarrassment of Adam and Eve, and the confusion of the whole of creation. And unfortunately, this satanic warfare is still going on, raging and growing in momentum in an alarming proportion all over the world, and Lucifer seems to be winning. 

In his wicked wisdom, Lucifer attacked the supernatural foundation of family life on earth and souls for heaven as laid by God. He tempted Adam and Eve to disobey God in his effort to strike at God, and unfortunately, he succeeded and by their disobedience, Adam has exposed the life of man on earth to the foul breath of Lucifer. So, he continues to attack, and most times, conquer in his efforts to frustrate the plans of God for man and creation. With his first victory, the life of man became susceptible to Lucifer as the disobedience of man provoked disorder in creation as against the order of God. So, life and living are now in shambles and in disarray because of the ever present poisonous breath of Lucifer in and around us on account of the fallen nature of man. He attacks and he conquers, due to the weaknesses of the man and the woman as a husband and as a wife, and as inherited from our first parents. Lucifer has struck, and he continues to strike at homes and families in his efforts to ruin humanity, for a weak or failed home wreaks havoc in the life of every member of that family, the family itself and the community at large, and this is the joy of Lucifer. This is so, because in the ensuing tears, disorder and despair creeps into the life of man, and man in a state of despair doubts the existence of God.

Lucifer does this in his wicked efforts to steal souls from God, to deny God the love and affection of man and to take from man what he, Lucifer has lost forever; the holy presence of God. He tempts the man and the woman, individually and collectively that they might sin and thus be separated from God eternally as he is. Furthermore, he knows that a weak or failed family is the bane of every society as the rot (sin) in our homes is the foundation of the evil and disorder in our societies and all over the world. He knows that evil breeds more evil and disorder, leading to despair which simply means, to doubt the existence of God, and this is the endgame of Lucifer. So, the continuous attack of Lucifer on the cult of marriage is simply a continuation of the battle of darkness against light initiated in the Garden of Eden by Lucifer. It is the war (for lack of a better word) of Lucifer against God for his expulsion from heaven and his eternal damnation. He is fighting God through (in our way of speaking) the only weakness of God, which is the love of God for man. So, Lucifer attacks the man in his efforts to get at God for he knows he cannot contend with God directly. So, every victory of Lucifer over man is a victory of darkness over light, of death over life.

Lucifer succeeded against the first family, and is now at war with the wounded descendants of the house of Adam, using the same weapon and technique of tempting man to sin. He knows that it is from the spiritual bankruptcy in our homes and families that evil will flow into our streets for a conquered home is a conquered society, and a conquered society is a conquered nation. For if family is the foundation of the society and the family is corrupted in sin, then the society therefrom will most certainly be corrupt, and this is the focus of Lucifer. Thus, marriage as a most important assignment needs to be well cared for and catered for if we are to find fulfillment in it and for it to be in alignment with the wishes of God for humanity which is populating the earth with life that honors God and souls for heaven. It needs to be well guided, protected and defended from the snares of the eternally cursed one through the grace of God, for man on his own cannot contend with Lucifer because of our injured spirit. 

Unfortunately, Lucifer seems to be succeeding in his evil enterprise of ruining souls through his destruction of marriages as many have deliberately or inadvertently entered into alliance with Lucifer through their acts of sin and disobedience. By their attitude and conduct, many do the evil will of Lucifer instead of the holy and divine will of God, and so they contribute to the efforts of the enemy Lucifer. But I assure you that Lucifer is not capable of love or affection for anybody, that whatever he gives or proposes in his temptations is a grand design to steal and destroy souls. He uses every means to tempt man to sin against God in order to deny God the affection of His creatures, and to deny man the privilege of heaven. He succeeded against Adam and Eve, failed against Jesus the Christ, and has now focused on you and me. He labors day and night to steal our marriage vocation in order to destroy your soul and other souls, using you as an instrument for he is the thief who has come to steal from you the gifts and promises of your loving father which he has lost forever; the presence of God which we call heaven. And because he is the definition of ugliness and cannot confront you frontally, he hides in the darkness of sin to tempt you so that you may offend God and join him to be where he is; forever without God, which we call hell. 

God created marriage so that man shall leave his father and mother to be with his wife, to become one and form another family for the propagation of life on earth and souls for heaven. So, marriage is a creation and an assignment of God for man. It is regulated by God and He gave us the means to defend it. Marriage is not a product of or an institution of man, made by man for the enjoyment of man. It is of God and for the glory of God, and therefore, its sustenance is beyond our human sense and manipulations. Marriage is a supernatural phenomenon that is nurtured, regulated, preserved and defended by the Supernatural, and man cannot successfully improve on the things of God outside the will of God. And because marriage involves a trinity of God, a man and a woman, it becomes a simple but complex phenomenon. This is so, because whereas God is good, holy and perfect, neither the man nor the woman is good, holy and perfect like God because of the Sin. And so, we have two injured spirits coming together to perform an assignment in holiness for the holy and perfect God in the midst of the temptations of Lucifer, and here lies the problem.

I have listened to many lectures and read a lot of literatures on what marriage is and how to sustain it, and as usual as in most of our human endeavors, there is the display of ignorance, which is excusable, and an apparent deliberate effort or conspiracy to deny our human spirituality and a pretense that God is now irrelevant in the affairs of man, which are inexcusable. In our comfort zones, we give allegiance to and profess a belief in God, but in public and or serious matters, we develop cold feet and deny Him outright or pretend He is not relevant to the issue at stake. And so, I dare to ask, in which aspects of our humanity is God not relevant? And most painful is the fact that these humanistic assertions and stipulations are mostly from those who ought to know better by virtue of their names and office, but it is as if they are ashamed or afraid to publicly associate with God. And so, they advocate common sense and human wisdom, refusing to acknowledge God for who He is and man for what we are. They say every other thing but deliberately refuse to say the only one thing that is necessary; that God is everything and that everything is in God.

Instead of advocating that it is only in the knowledge of God that man will find the answer he seeks, they advance and propagate humanism, deliberately ignoring the centrality of God in the affairs of man. And so, they refuse or neglect to acknowledge that marriage, like life itself is a gift or grace from God, and that being from God, its sustenance must therefore necessarily come from God the Originator. So, they close their eyes to the Divine origin of life and marriage, pretending to know and be convinced of all other things but the knowledge of the Almighty; all in their effort to deny the Supernatural. And I weep and wonder why this betrayal, if they are not aware of and or concerned that marriage, like life itself is protected and defended by God in His holy Commandments. They profess the Gospel but deny the Doctrine.

It is true that man is the masterpiece of creation because the life of man is different from and miles apart from the life of any other thing in creation, and this is so because God is in man. My soul, which is the life in me, is the image of God in me and the reason I am alive as a human being. And to make me happy, God my father gave me authority over all the beautiful things He created as my toys, and above all, He gave me the joy and grace of family life; of a suitable partner and the grace of procreating. Unlike the animals and plants who do not marry but procreate for the joy and pleasure of man, I, as a human being, through the grace of marriage as instituted by God populate the earth with images of God and candidates for heaven as willed by my father God. And this is why, from the very beginning, God made us male and female, and so through marriage, I become an imitator of my father God and His helper in creation; procreating through marriage, not what dies, but what survives death. Oh, what a grace. So, marriage is not a product of man and is not at his pleasure or discretion, but is a divine assignment for divine purposes, preserved, protected, regulated and defended by God. But the stain of original sin and our actual sins has robbed us of the perfection we inherited from our father God, and so, there is no perfect human being on earth that will be a perfect wife or husband. 

Through our weakness, we have made the perfect things of God imperfect, and so, marriage, like life itself is no longer bliss but a part of the Cross of Life. Recall that before the Sin, Adam and Eve had a blissful life on paradise on earth in the holy presence of the Almighty. But when they sinned, they lost everything and misery became part and parcel of life of man but God in His mercy did not forsake man. At the appointed time and through the merits of Jesus the Christ, hope for salvation was restored to mankind, but access to the holy bliss of the presence of God is now reserved for those who remain faithful in all aspects of their life on earth, including marriage. Heaven, which is the holy presence of God, is now reserved for those who are prepared and ready to follow the Way of the Truth in order to have Life eternal. So, on account of the Sin, marriage is no longer bliss, but an assignment for which we will be judged by the Owner of life and the cult of marriage.

In marriage, the man and the woman are under a higher obligation to God in all things and thereafter to each other. It is this individual and collective commitment and faithfulness to God and to each other that sustains, defends and protects the marriage vocation. But on account of the unfaithfulness of Adam and Eve in the Garden at the instance of Lucifer and the consequences thereto, man has become incapacitated and now struggles to do good and to be faithful to God and neighbor. This is why Jesus, in His merciful love raised the cult of marriage to the degree of a Sacrament in His desire to assist mankind in the marriage assignment which we have messed up at the instance of Lucifer. He did this so that we may remain steadfast and not feel alone and forsaken in the difficult times of marriage, but that grace may abound to sooth our pains and wipe our tears in our marriage endeavor. 

And as God will not infringe on the will of man to force man to love and obey Him, so He will not ordinarily force any man or woman to honor and cherish his or her marriage vocation as our faithfulness or unfaithfulness is but a reflection of our faithfulness to God. God will not compel a man to be a good husband or a woman to be a good wife because being a good and faithful partner is nothing more than the fulfillment of your many obligations to God, while your wickedness is your rebellion against the will of God.   But on account of the goodwill and tears of a faithful partner, God will enlighten the other to appreciate the goodness of the faithful partner and nothing more, but He will be with the faithful soul, to support and to console as He has promised. But bear in mind that at the end of the day, God will hold each man and each woman accountable for their actions and omissions as husband and wife; they will both account for the tears and disorder they each generated in their home and family. 

So, it is absolutely necessary that from the onset and before the act of marriage that you chose and resolve, out of love for God, to be a good and faithful partner to your husband or wife, and hope that your partner will be as faithful and committed. This is the best you can do, and it is this personal commitment to please God in your marriage vocation, as in all other things, that will be the nature upon which the grace of God will act. For without your own commitment to love and sacrifice for the safety of your marriage out of your love for God, God Himself cannot do much, for His grace works on nature. So, your wish for a happy marriage and married life depends, to a great extent on your preparedness and commitment to remain a faithful child of God as a husband or as a wife, and to be a faithful charitable partner to whoever your husband or wife may be for the glory of God.

Marriage is not a civil contract between any two people or people of different sexes like a business concern. No, it is a covenant; a lifelong bond, a spiritual contract between two people of different sexes as ordained and sanctioned by God. It is an indissoluble bond, stipulated, regulated, confirmed and sanctioned by the sanctifying power of God, and being a sacred rite, no authority, law or human whim will be able to separate what God has created and united at the instance of any man or woman. It is a sin to attempt to do so, and it is a futile effort, for no man can separate what has been joined at the instance of God, and forbidden by God to be separated. And as every male or female originate from a soul at the instance of God, and every soul is the same at the point of its creation by God, and the soul is the life that animate the body, therefore, every male is a suitable companion for any female and vice versa. And it matters not whether you were married in a Church, a Mosque, in the Village Square or at a Registry. Marriage is marriage, and so it is even if no ceremonies were performed but you are known as husband and wife, with or without children, for so you are before God. 

So, since marriage is of divine origin and is a spiritual enterprise for supernatural purpose, but whose nature has been injured by the sin of man at the instigation of Lucifer, how can one prepare for it, to hope for a fruitful marriage and or manage it adequately so as to reap the fruits and blessings attached thereto and ultimately make heaven for it was never the desire of God to give us what will harm us. And as I mentioned above, many people have offered different opinions on how to prepare for marriage and how to make marriage work, but curiously, they all proffer human solutions. Their conclusions are based on human wisdom and on a philosophy of humanism and rationalism, pretending not to know or preferring to ignore the fact that marriage is a heavenly phenomenon and not manmade, and that man is a spiritual being and not a machine that is or can be programmed.  And so, instead of looking up to God for guide, they try to rationalize marriage as if it is something made by man, and so can be managed with our human sense. But I do know that no human wisdom can improve upon, defend or perfect the things of God because God’s designs are holy and divine, and He alone can safeguard what he has created in His own ways. Thus, we only succeed in desecrating such holy things to our ruin because our efforts are not products of love but of rebellion, for it is in rebellion that we want everything our ways.

It is common knowledge that whatever trade or profession one aspires to be involved in, such a person will learn the trade from a master or attend an institution where he will be taught by experts in that field. Therefore, since marriage is not a creation of man but the design of God for man, I make bold to say that I have only one source for our guide; God Himself. Bear in mind that God did not create man for himself, no, man was created at the pleasure of God, and marriage is one of his many assignments. Our obedience and faithfulness to God in His precepts is proof of our loyalty to God, the proof that we believe and accept God as our Father, and that we are His children destined to inherit His heavenly treasures. In the same vein, our disobedience is our betrayal of God and a sign of our rebellion against the Almighty. 

This is why St. John told us that whoever obeys God’s commands lives in union with God, and Jesus Himself told us again and again that if we observe the Commandments, we will persevere in the love of God and our joy will be complete even while on earth. He also told us that as a branch cannot bear fruit by itself, so also we cannot bear fruit unless we remain in Him, and I dare say that, until we accept to walk in the ways of God in everything as Christ has taught us, we will continue to run around in circles like a dog chasing its tail, increasing our woes and our lamentations until we pass out or we make of earth a hell. Also, know that despite His love for us, God goes away from us when we do not obey His laws and inspirations, He leaves us alone and we become demons, for without Him, we are easily cut up in the coil of the Snake to become snakes. So, how do we ensure that we are one with God in our marriage endeavor so that we may not become demons, but on the instead bear beautiful fruits for the glory of God? The answer is Obedience, Obedience, and Obedience to the word of God. 

Obedience is the key that opens the treasures of heaven. It is your rod of authority that enables you to look up to your Father who is in Heaven and cry to Him; Father, I need the bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. And for those already in marriage, your obedience is the cry of your soul; the voice of your spirit that cries to God day and night for His consolation, grace and mercy, for He is aware of everything. But I remind you once again that God has no perfect children on earth who will be perfect husbands and wife on account of the Sin and our sins. He knows we are all damaged goods, overwhelmed by our flesh and humanity, and so, as a good father, He guides the feet of His good children to their brothers and sisters who can help them, with their strength and weakness, to remain good children of God on earth so that their souls and many other souls may be saved. This, I believe is the best He can do because God respects our miserable human will, and will not compel us to be good, though it is our duty to be. 

So, whereas God desires our peace and happiness in our marriage vocation, the quantum we get is a reflection of the commitment and preparedness of each and both partners, individually and collectively, to love and live in love as products of Love at all times. Marriage, like life itself is no longer a bed of roses as planned by God because of the sin of Adam, and so, there will be good times and in bad time. And no matter how committed you are or hope to be in your marriage, you will need the support and faithfulness of your partner, and since you cannot control the will of your husband or wife, there is a limit to which you can hope on him or her. And I make haste to remind you that the good Book has already warned that we should not put our hope in any human being, but on God alone. For whereas God is constant and faithful, man is most inconstant, but bear in mind I said that God will guide the steps of His good children. 

And above all, bear in mind that heaven is the essence of everything, and that it is our everyday choices in life that determines where we end up; with or without God. So, whether you are about to marry or you are already married, the same principles applies, for every marriage, like life itself is a battle field and faced with the same enemy called Lucifer. He manifests his attacks in different ways in his efforts to steal souls from God. He has only one mode of operation; he tempts man with anything and everything to disobey God. But knowing that man cannot contend with Lucifer on his own because of our injured spirits and bearing in mind that our help comes from the Lord who made the heavens and the earth, how and where do we get the grace we need to safeguard our marriages and contend with Lucifer? I repeat again and again that the answer is God and God alone, and so my brothers and sisters, let us look up to our father God for His guide in this our topic of discussion.

But bear in mind that this grace is not for us to avoid all vicissitudes of life, but to help us bear them when they do occur, for by our sin and sinfulness, we have created disorder and so must bear the burden of the disorder we have created and which we truly deserve. This is why there is no perfect home on earth as there is no perfect man for a perfect husband, or a perfect woman for a perfect wife for propagation of perfect children.  Furthermore, bear in mind that no matter your personal resolution to strive to be good out of love for God, your neighbor will cause you to stumble, and to fall, and this is why Jesus said ‘be on the alert and pray always that you will have the strength to go safely through all those things that will happen, and to stand before the Son of Man.’ Thus, I make bold to say that our channel of grace, for help in this heavenly enterprise is nothing more than our obedience to God in everything, especially the followings:   

I Am the Lord Your God. This is the very first commandment of God, announcing to all creation that He alone is God, and that we owe Him obedience. In everywhere on the face of the earth, this fact is repeated and acknowledged daily and continuously by everything except by man who now pretends that he is God. The sun, the moon, the rain, sunshine, water, grass, stars, animals, light and darkness, health, wealth and poverty echo the words: He is the Lord our God by their constant and perfect obedience to the will of  God, but man is closing his eyes, his ears and his conscience against these words. He pretends that God does not exist, he denies the Almighty in private and in public, doing anything and everything to deny that God exist. He runs and pretends that he can hide from God, and has created many gods for himself as replacements for the one true God. Man has made an idol of the one true God, and for this he suffers. For many, fame, money and power are the gods we know and serve, and we are ready to do anything and everything for the sake of these gods and for our self satisfaction. We attribute to nature, to man and to ourselves the glory and honor due to God alone, and we have relegated God to the background in everything, yet we say we are Christians.

We remember God only when our human efforts have failed, and instead of being first, He is the last in our conversations and considerations, if He is there at all. We wear the garb of Christians, but our hearts are far from God, as in our disobedience we have become the lords of our lives, and we dictate our will to the one true God. Self-satisfaction has become our motto, while pride and hatred is our second in-command; Christians by name and not by nature. If you acknowledge the Almighty as your God, you will live daily in humble obedience to His will; you will not steal, will not kill, will not commit adultery or bear false witness, will respect the Sabbath and honor the holy name of God. As a man, you will love and care for your wife, your home and your family as the king, prophet and priest that you are. As a woman, you will respect, support and honor your husband as the queen and mother of your home and family. You will be a brother and a sister to your partner; friends and soul mates, and will have peace.   

In our Creed, the first statement is, I believe in God, the Father Almighty. If really you believe in God, then, acknowledge Him by your lifestyle so that your actions will prove that you belong to Him. Give God your heart, your soul and your might, let the words of your mouth bring glory to His name and let your actions echo the words: the Lord is my Shepherd through your humility, kindness, patience and charity. Then He will really be your Father and will provide your heart desires, for He said, the measure you give will be the measure you will receive. If you acknowledge God as your Father through your words and actions, He will care for you as His child, will protect you and will provide for you. He will give you a husband or a wife who will love and care for you, who will help you to make good use of the gift of your life for the glory of God for it was He who said, it is not good for man to live alone, I will give him a helper, and God is faithful to His words. 

You shall not use My Name in vain. God is Holy and He commands us to respect His name for it is Holy as He is Holy. He demands that we use His name with honor, respect and reverence because He is God. We use the name of God in vain whenever we utter that name without making ourselves worthy of God. This is when our soul is dirty due to sin as a soul that is in sin lacks grace, and where there is no grace, God cannot be there and where there is no God, Satan reigns. Or do you not know that your heart is your first altar where God wants to reign? If He is not there on account of the filth of sin in you, then it becomes very easy for you to malign, play with and amuse yourself with the holy Name of God, because He is far from you. Then God becomes ‘gosh’ to you and Jesus becomes ‘jeez’, then you use His name to curse and to deceive in your business and endeavors. This is why in our pride and sinfulness we can ridicule the Holy Name in mundane things such as in taking pictures and in cutting cakes at social events. Imagine the effrontery. 

For many, we easily and recklessly bargain with God and His Holy Name in our everyday selfish domestic lifestyles and enterprises to the extent that the dogs and cats in our homes have more respect and reverence to their names. We have abused and desecrated the holy name of God that it has now become a plaything in our homes, markets and establishments. The holy Name of God is ridiculed by all and sundry again and again; we are guilty of blasphemy a million thousand times. And in our miserable bankruptcy and stupidity, we turned around to censor the Name that saves and will save us in our formal gatherings and social networks. Imagine the audacity of the ‘modern man’. But is it that we do not know that it is a sin to do so, or we do not care? Know that we dishonor God whenever we maltreat His holy Name in Himself as God, in Jesus the Christ, and in the Holy Spirit. 

Do you honor and respect the name of your father? Then why do you not honor and respect God in His Holy Name in obedience to His command, even if not out of love. God is Holy and His name is Holy, it is Salvation for those who love Him, and is to be invoked by all in love and in reverence for our salvation, with our hearts, our deeds, and our thoughts. Call on the holy Name of God out of gratitude when you are happy, and when you are sad, tempted, and afraid, call on Him for He alone can save. Call on Him in your needs, in your honest deeds and in your sorrows, for you know that your help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth. He is your Father and your only true and faithful friend who loves you and expects nothing more than your love and respect in return. But note that He will not honor those who have refused to Honor Him in His holy Name; He will be deaf to their calls, no matter how much they shout.

Observe the Day of The Lord. Do an honest work in Six days and devote the Seventh day to the Lord and to your soul as God has commanded. God created the universe in Six days, and in our way of speaking, He rested on the Seventh. He commanded us to do the same, or are we perhaps wiser and stronger than Him? Why do we not want to imitate our Father in obedience, but on the instead chose to break His commandments to our peril. Every being in creation (except man) obey this command of God to rest. Look at the animals and trees, they comply and they obey, but man refuses to his own detriment and ruin. What about you and whose side are you? Let the day of the Lord be His, and Rest as He commanded. You have no excuse and should not create one.  For many of us, even to go to Church on Sunday is a problem and or out of routine, we would rather do our washing, our cleaning, our shopping and our visiting. Know that the respect you have for the Sabbath is a reflection of your love and respect for God.

If the Sabbath is just like any other days of the week as far as you are concerned, then you are very far from your father’s house and if you are far from home in disobedience, then you are a bad child. And if you are a bad child, God will not listen to you except you repent. He gave you six out of the seven days of each week, and commands that you rest and dedicate one day to Him. This is not discretionary, but a command and your obedience is your proof of loyalty to God who created you. When you obey the Lord in His commands, your affairs becomes His concern, and who can outdo the Lord in anything? Our disobedience to honor the Sabbath in anyway whatsoever, be it our refusal or neglect to go to Church on Sundays, our nature and style of dressing in the Church, our attitude and disposition in the Church and our refusal to rest from our trade, businesses and endeavors earns us nothing but disappointments, loss and betrayals because we have first betrayed God. 

Even when we manage to go for Mass, are we the perpetual late comers and who are always in a hurry to leave the Church? We deny God what is His own and we deprive ourselves the rest we so badly need and we say we are Christians. Some of us are so wicked that we take our trade and business with us to church on Sundays, proceed thereto after Mass or come back home to continue with our trade on the internet. For others, the Sabbath is available for their special academic and professional programs and extra jobs, for meetings, where nothing but money, food and drinks; social issues that add no benefit to our souls are for consideration. Know that you are stealing from the Lord and also scattering your wealth and favors. Keep the Sabbath holy and rest as He commanded, and let the Lord bless your efforts of the past six days and give you grace and strength for the coming week; else you labor in vain for disappointments are the ugly fruits of disobedience.

Honor Your Parents. Parents are honored by the true obedience, love and respect of their children. They are to be honored because God said so, and this is the only commandment with an attachment. After God, a father and a mother are the donors of life and of all material necessities of life, they are our first teachers and our first friends, and God commands that we honor them. Their strength or weakness should be of no basis to you, let God be the judge. As a man or woman, you aspire to have a family someday (except you chose to be a priest or religious), therefore obey and honor God through your parents so that you may live long in the midst of grace and peace from above. This promise of long life on earth is most certainly accompanied by all that is necessary for a fruitful life, including a life partner for those who obey their parents. Parents break their backs working in order to feed, clothe and keep their children, they rise from their beds to watch our sleep, deprive themselves of their rest to care for us and make a bed for us on their laps when we are most tired; they prepared us for life. And God has commanded that we appreciate their labor and tears with our love, respect and honor.

But many have chosen to make friends with strangers and close their hearts to their parents, causing them pain and tears. But who could be a better role model to you than your father and mother who gave you life, but we refuse to honor them, and instead run after the poisoned fruits of fame and wealth. I warn you to reconcile now before it is too late and no matter what you think of them, let God be the judge for the behavior of a child who tortures his parents will not be forgotten by God. He who wrongs a parent offends God because He orders us to honor our parents for our lives to be blessed. Know that death is not a separation to relationships but our doorway to eternity, so reconcile with the soul of your parent whom you ridiculed and disgraced with your conducts. Book Masses for them and do charity for their souls, ask God for your pardon and mercy in the Sacrament of Penance. You may think they are wicked, old, illiterates, dirty and stupid, but God commands us to love and honor them, and that ends it. Know that from a bad child comes the future thief, killer, prostitute, ritualist, unfaithful husband and an unfaithful wife. Reconcile now, else you will receive the same measure from your own, if any, and from others.

Thou shall Not Fornicate or Commit Adultery. Remember that you are made in the image of God which means that God dwells in you. Therefore, your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit that contains an altar, but God cannot be found where there is corruption and filth for an impure body is a desecrated altar without God. Fornication and adultery have dehumanized many of us that in our sober moments, we feel nothing but contempt for ourselves. And for many of us, we have not only sold our bodies to Satan but also our souls because of sexual gratifications. To hear of adultery, fornication, abortion, lesbianism, gay practice and other sexual deviants among the children of God is an abomination. Is the pleasure of the encounter really worth the pain and disgrace to you and those around you? Do you love yourself so little and hate God so much that you chose to dishonor your soul and offend God?

Abortion from fornication and adultery is the killing of innocent souls; you are a killer and will answer for it. The sin of fornication, adultery, lesbianism, gay practice and other sexual deviants are sins against our souls; leprosy of the soul that kill both body and soul, for when we engage in these practices, we lower our dignity as human beings to that of a most impure beast. And like Esau, we barter our soul for a moment’s pleasure, and God turns His holy countenance away from us in disgrace for we have first betrayed Him. But repentance invigorates, purifies and elevates a soul. Honor yourself by making your soul honorable through an honest lifestyle. Justify yourself with God by committing no more sins against your soul, desire and encounter the mercy of God in the Sacrament of Penance, and like St. Mary Magdalene, take on a new name today, a new beginning, become who you are meant to be: a child of God, become a Christian.

Who is a Christian? A Christian is not someone who attends Church regularly, but he who lives in obedience to God’s commands. The lifestyle of a Christian preaches the good news everyday, which is love for God and love for neighbor. They are humble, meek and kind; have no power of their own but rely on the grace and mercy of God in all things no matter their personal disposition. They honor God and the holy things of God; they do not steal, do not kill, do not fornicate and do not tell lies. They are poor in spirit because they are not attached to worldly things for their hope is in heavenly things. Christians are children of God through the merits of Jesus the Christ, and they attach themselves to their Father who is in heaven with the rope of holy obedience and the garment of faithfulness. Know that obedience to God in everything is your one and only proof of being a Christian. 

For strength to withstand the travails of this life, Christians gather regularly in the House of God to be fed and nourished with the Word and Bread of life and the other Sacraments, which are channels of grace ordained by Jesus for our salvation. It is of outmost importance that you receive the Sacrament of Baptism else you remain a pagan, and like the man who was not properly dressed in the parable of the wedding feast, you will be thrown out because of your pride. The Sacraments are very important to man; they are sublime gifts of God for our sanctification and salvation, so avail yourself of their benefits. You are Baptized, but have not been to Confession and Communion for a very long time because you think they are not really necessary, you are too much for such ‘sentiments’ or that your sins are too horrible. Are your sins more painful and horrible than the sufferings of Jesus for your sake? Do not allow Satan to continue to deceive you; be like the prodigal child and return today to your Father who is anxious to hear your voice and see your face.

The Blessed Virgin Mary is available to accompany you to the Altar of Grace and Mercy, and Jesus will never refuse His Mother anything. So, ask for Her intercession through the Rosary and attend Mass regularly to feed on Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament for grace and strength to overcome the temptations that surround you day and night. If you are not a Catholic, be faithful to God in your choice, for it is not the church, but our faithfulness through obedience that matters. Know that on your own, you cannot do much, but can only struggle; God alone can help you and lift you up. Painfully, many of us have refused to attend the necessary prescribed Classes to receive the Sacraments because we are ‘too big’, and so, we settle for less. 

But Confirmation is the Sacrament of the Holy Spirit, and how can you face the challenges of this life without the Seven Gifts of the Holy Spirit and how can you contend with Lucifer in your married life without the grace of Matrimony? Please my friends, it is impossible to be faithful to God in this life and in marriage without the grace of God. And since marriage is a Sacrament, it must be appreciated as such in all aspects. The ceremony is not, and should not be a social event or jamboree. So humble yourself in all arrangements and preparations so that you may receive the blessings of God and not just the applause of man. And since marriage makes one of two, the two ought to be one in Faith and must learn to Pray.

But what is Prayer? 

Prayer is being in communion with God. And since God is the Perfect Spirit, the most effective way of being in communion with Him is to be spiritually connected to Him through obedience. He who loves obeys the one he loves, and the first avenue of prayer is obedience to God in His commands. Nobody can claim to be in communion with God when he is in disobedience; he is a liar. But when we live in obedience to the word of God, we are in constant communion with Him as everything we do honors Him. Then we pray, not with our lips, but with our hearts; the first Altar of God and where He wants to reign, and this is the most effective way to pray. But whenever we live in disobedience, everything we do dishonors God despite the applause of our brothers and sisters; we are liars and deceivers, enemies of man and of God. Then we may fast, say all the novenas and attend all the daily masses and night vigils, but all will be in vain because we are empty vessels making a lot of noise in our disobedience. 

But obedience to God is our strength, our refuge and our defense as a soul in obedience is like a seed planted by the river side; it lacks nothing because he is in communion with the Source and no evil can prevail against such a soul. So, we must learn to pray well by firstly getting connected to God through humble obedience to His commands, and everything we do thereafter will become prayer because we are in union with our Father. Then before you ask, He has already provided, for as a good father, He knows what is good for you. For those who are sad, sorrowful and uncomfortable because your conscience accuse you of many sins, rejoice for it is a sign of repentance, you are a soul seeking God, and God forgives everything. Visit the Sacrament of Penance and offload your burden at the foot of the cross. Give yourself a new name; a child of God and remain steadfast in your resolution to be faithful to God in all things, and God will defend you from the snares of the evil one. Honor and acknowledge God for who He is with a life of humble obedience, shun all immoral and wicked conducts and give to God what is His. Be good and be just to all that comes your way, for God is in all of us no matter what we might have become. 

Bear in mind that as you are not perfect, so there is no perfect man or woman on earth, and so, God cannot give you a perfect husband or wife. But as a perfect Father, He will guide His good children away from the paths of His wicked children, so that all may not become wicked. He will guide the steps of the weak ones to those of the stronger ones, so that as brothers and sisters, children of the same Father, there will be love and charity everywhere for the sake of our salvation. But unfortunately, many make the mistake of choosing a partner for God to ratify, we insist on our choice because we believe we are in love and we know what is good for us. Other times, it is because he or she is from a famous and wealthy home, from my state and or of a particular discipline and academic qualification. We then demand that God must bless our choice by all means, even when wisdom is telling us a different thing, and we suffer for it. Let God choose for you. 

And you may ask how do I know the choice of God? More often than not, when you are fit and ready for marriage, God will put a partner by your side so long as you have always been on the side of God by your faithfulness. And more often than not, it is you that looks down on him or her, because he or she does not meet your standard. You are the blind, seeking a blind. Let God lead you to make the right choice, for He alone knows tomorrow, and has promised not to forsake His own. All you need to do is be a Faithful Child, and let your Father do the needful at the appropriate time; the Good Shepherd will always take good care of his flock and lead them to good pasture. He is the Creator of all men and women and He knows our strength and our weakness, He knows what you can manage. Do you desire a good partner, then first be a good and faithful child to the Lord in all things and endeavor to avoid the pitfalls mentioned above.

If you are in union with your Father who is in heaven through obedience, His grace will cover you and transform you into a virtuous woman that every good mother would want as a daughter in-law. Your humility and kindness will become an attraction that will draw the heart of a God fearing man to your doorstep, and beauty, wealth, education and origin will become useless and irrelevant, because he who has God has everything. That is why St. Peter urges us not to use outward aids to make ourselves beautiful such as the way you do your hair, or the dresses you wear; instead, your beauty should consist of your true inner self, the ageless beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of the greatest value in God’s sight. But when you are not in union with God, you will waste your time and energy on your outward appearance and human connections, you will become a thing of beauty for wayward souls, but not a wife material; a bus stop for men, but not a destination, and out of frustration, you will dump yourself on whoever is available.

If you wish to be considered for a marriage partner, you must present yourself as a wife material capable of becoming a mother. No man wants to marry a lady, everyman wants a wife. Ladies look for men but serious men look for wives. Ladies advertise themselves with cheap popularity, loud dressing and noise, while the wife material is full of grace, humility and restraint, and like precious jewel, she does not advertise herself cheaply. And for my brothers who desire a good wife, I urge you to let goodness become your second nature. Free yourself from all forms of wickedness, lust and hate for God will not give you any of His good daughters for a wife when He knows that you are a deceitful, harsh and a wicked man. You can inherit wealth and possessions from your parents but only the Lord can give you a sensible wife, so do not believe that it is your money or good look that will give you a good wife, no, not at all. If you do not reverence the Lord and obey His commands, He will not give you any of His precious daughters; you will end up marrying someone like you and both of you will live like two dogs on a chain.  

Do you feel alone, confused, abused and forsaken? Are you unhappy in your marriage, overwhelmed with a sense of guilt and betrayal that you think it is all over or too late for you? No my dear, the love of God for us is so strong that no matter how low we have fallen on the ladder of life, and how much we have been betrayed, God is waiting with open arms to clean us up. He was the first to be betrayed, and so knows how you are hurting. But be sure you are not the guilty partner, and be just in your expectations. And if you are the guilty one, do not despair but seek the face of God and reconcile with your partner. Look up to God in everything for those who hope in Him are never alone or forsaken, they have Jesus as a Father, the Blessed Virgin Mary as a Mother and the Angels as friends. Let God be the judge. In Jesus and with time, you will find your peace and solace, but you must become accustomed to doing good for the sake of good, without compulsion, curiosity or desire to get entertainment out of it, for it is in our faithfulness that we will find God, and He cannot be deceived. 

See every event in your day as an opportunity to please God, by loving God and your neighbor. Occupy yourself with pleasing God through obedience to His word and God will take care of your needs. If I have no love for God and neighbor, it is useless to seek Him day and night, unless and until I first put myself in a suitable condition to find Him, and God is found in love. He who settles in charity finds God easily without having to make any painful search, and he who has God has everything, and is successful in all his endeavors. Remember the saying that if the Lord does not build the house, the laborers labor in vain. Entrust the Lord with your affections, your hopes and aspirations and with your fears and pains. He desires your trust, for He loves you much more than you can imagine and He knows everything about you. So, trust Him and let Him do what He said He will. But I remind you that as you are not perfect, so your wife or husband will not be perfect, so therefore, seek not your will but the will of God in all things. And remember that you are not the judge but Him. 

If you are faithful, God will give you a husband or a wife, who though not perfect will not lead you to hell. He or she will be your helper and support in your life journey to heaven with his or her strength and weakness because you have entrusted yourself to God. And even if tomorrow he or she decides to betray, let God be the judge of the one that betrayed. But never divest yourself of the protection of prayers and good works, not even in your sorrows, for they blunt the weapons of Satan and the malice of the world. But remember that prayers are alive when they are flavored with love and sacrifice, especially the sacrifice for the one who betrays. So, never lay down these weapons that cause heaven to open and pour out its graces and blessings upon the faithful. But mind you, and as the Good Book says, never put your trust in any human being but in God, for He alone is faithful. The man will betray, and the woman will betray; God alone will not.

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